Tell me about tomorrow...

Yesterday, I had this dream. This dream involved me working in some sort of educational institution. It almost looked the a hotel lobby but it was basically unspoken that there were classrooms and such. I was sort of like an intern person and I was told by someone to go to the basement to find such and such a thing.

(Now I've been having strange and creepy dreams...VERY creepy dreams for the past couple of months. And this one is the creepiest yet.)

So I walk down to this basement, and basements in general are creepy. But this one was HELL like the bowels of hell. Weird octopus creatures, shadowy dark figures, monsters with no faces. The whole creepy nine yards. Basically the only thing keeping me from falling deep into this pit was me walking on planks of wood that shook. This shadow man in a top hat kept grabbing my arm telling me to come with him. To come further into the basement. To not wake up.

I knew I was dreaming - and was trying to wake up but he wouldn't let me. I screamed for my father in the dream, screamed for my cat. But the shadow became more aggressive. I ran and hid behind a crate and began praying.

(Now those of you that know me know that I'm scared to point to there being any sort of God, or anything. I'm more prone to calling everyone's "God" the"universe." But I prayed anyway)

I kept saying, "Please, please, whatever is out there, universe, god, whatever you are called...help me wake up please." In the dream I was having a crisis of faith. A CRISIS OF FUCKING FAITH. This didn't wake me up - what woke me up was the fact that I had picked up my phone and used it as a weapon. I actually got up (sleep walking) grabbed my phone from my pants pocket and waved it madly at the shadow man. Whom now was walking at me in my room as I was waking up.

I'm starting to feel as though something is changing in me - in my life. I'm starting to not care about things. I'm starting to feel like there isn't enough time for me. I'm starting to feel like I'm wasting my life. This scares me for a number of reasons. But it mostly scares me because this is how people I know have felt before they died. Death is just a change, and maybe it is just a personality change. A quarter life crisis that is making itself apparent in dreams. But it is still creepy. My dreams are gory and involve me being forced to give up my soul in all of them or give up the soul of my loved ones. But I fight like hell in all of them.